Why Is It Being Normalised To 'Welcome' Children To Sex?

Why indeed. A guest post by Hon Rodney Hide.

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My eye was caught by a beautifully coloured book on prominent display in the Frankton Library, Queenstown. It was so vibrant and cheery. The title was “Welcome to Sex” which I thought was very odd. 

It was in the youth section of the library along with books like “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” which didn’t receive such prominent display and was nowhere near as vibrant. 

The Youth Section is 13 years and up but precocious readers ten years and younger are happily reading there. 

The title confused me. What sort of person welcomes a child to sex? 

Someone creepy? Someone nasty?  I am not at all sure.

I opened the book and immediately turned bright red with embarrassment. The book is hard core. I imagined the children in the library all staring at me. I probably made it worse by scurrying to a corner for a closer look. 

To call it explicit does not do the word explicit justice. “Welcome to Sex” is filled with extremely graphic drawings that leave nothing to the imagination. It includes derogatory terms for female parts which the men I worked with in the North Sea oil rigs in the 1970s would frown upon as derogatory of women. I assume the book was written in such a style to be down and cool with kids. The kids I know would go, “Yuk!”  

The book’s colouring is no doubt to attract the very young. 

The book is targeted at 11 to 14 year olds. 

I am not easily disgusted.  But I was. I could not believe such a book was sitting in the library, on prominent display, in the Youth Section, one shelf from the children’s section. 

The small Frankton Library has five copies and an audio disk version. I discovered it is just one of a number of books for kids similarly explicit. 

The content is insane.

Boys are described as penis owners. Girls as vagina owners. Our beautiful, wonderful, innocent children are reduced to owners of their genitals. It is mad. And it is evil. 

I won’t disgust you with the book’s contents. It’s enough to say that it teaches young girls how to bring their lesbian girlfriends to orgasm with explicit detail, graphic pictures and a number of options.

The publisher blurb gushes:

Every household needs a copy of this best-selling, age-appropriate introductory guide to sex and sexuality for teens of all genders. 

It is not a fringe book. It has won multiple awards, e.g. the 2024 Australian Book Industry Awards Book of the Year for Older Children. 

What sort of women would write such a book? 

What sort of people would laud it?  What sort of people would stock it in the public library?

Well, I googled the authoresses. One is Yumi Stynes. She is described as a feminist podcaster. The other is Dr Melissa Kang. She wrote the Dolly Doctor health column for the teen girl magazine Dolly. 

Yumi Stynes marriage collapsed amongst mutual allegations of violence. Dr Kang’s marriage also failed. 

Such marital strife is commonplace these days but in seeking sex and relationship advice for my sons and daughters I would be looking to the likes of my mum. That is to say, someone successful at relationships.  My mum loved and adored the same man her entire life. And likewise my Dad loved and cherished her. She raised healthy kids and grandkids successfully and well. Her life was filled with love and joy despite a very rocky start in her own life. 

My mum would give Dr Kang and Ms Stynes short shrift. And rightly so. 

The librarians stocking the book?   The Library and Information Association of New Zealand Aotearoa (Lianza) has said it is important for libraries to have an inclusive collection with their standing committee on freedom of information chairwoman, Louise LaHatte, saying, “We trust individuals to make their own decisions about what they read and believe.” 

That includes kids clearly. So beware.

Dr Tracy Clelland is an expert at the University of Canterbury. She says the book is just what kids need. She says research shows children as young as nine are asking about things such as sex toys and anal sex. 

One has to be at university to be that stupid. A nine year old girl is discussing anal sex at school. Do you:

a) call the authorities; or,
b) give them a book explaining how to do it?

Dr Clelland’s response is b) but to give the book to the entire school. It is impossible to take Dr Clelland seriously.

The book industry award body noted: “The industry rallied behind this guide when faced with attempts by a minority to censor its content and ban it from shelves - a victory that validates the demand for trustworthy content.”

There is nothing trustworthy in teaching 11 year olds graphic sex. There is nothing trustworthy in teaching them men can have babies. There is nothing trustworthy in reducing them to genital owners. 

Classification Status: Unrestricted

The Classification Office wrote a 12-page report to conclude the book should not be restricted because it is educational. That’s it. I don’t know why we still have the Classification Office when there is the wild west of the internet.  They are even less relevant when they deem hard core pornography educational. 

On being a Dad

I work hard to ensure my children have a childhood. It means being the Dad that restricts the internet and social media. It means having to watch over the school curriculum and withdraw your child from the relationship and sexuality courses. 

And now I have the library to worry about. We can no longer leave children unsupervised at the library to experience the joy of browsing books. You might as well take them straight to the Sex Shop around the corner.  They will no longer be children once they have seen “Welcome to Sex”.

Our children’s innocence and beauty is under attack. It is under attack in our schools and our public libraries. We are sending them out into a world that is toxic for them. 

How could this be?

I began by thinking it was a policy problem. Then I saw it as a culture war. I now know it is a spiritual battle. Only a great Evil would come after our kids in such a monstrous way.

My experience is that most parents and grandparents have no idea.  There is an easy awakening.  Go to the local library.  Or check out the school sex ed curriculum.  That shakes everyone awake in my experience. 

I was initially despondent with what is happening.

But I am not now.  The mums and dads are waking up to what is happening. There is a growing wrath. It is building like thunder.

We are being tested. We are being forced to decide where we stand and what we are prepared to do for our children. I have no doubt we will win. Good triumphs over Evil. And there is no love like the love of a mum and a dad for their children. That love will conquer all.

And we have Let Kids Be Kids.  It is a fast growing network of people with a moral compass, who see the importance of NOT being silent on this and related topics. It’s grassroots, it’s showing people what is happening to kids, it is empowering parents and grandparents, and connecting them.  I am so proud to be a small part of it.  And much braver and more confident of winning because of it.

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